I am not a saint, nor do I claim to be

Coco was a man of integrity, all his staff would tell you so.  And on the last episode where he could have bad-mouthed NBC and said it was just a part of the skit (there's always a bit of truth behind every joke isn't there?), he decided to look back and think of the good times and thanked NBC for everything.  What a swell guy.  Well, this got me thinking...and writing.

My reflections of my life and how much God has changed me as a person...hopefully for the better; but alas, I am not a Saint.

"I Am Not A Saint"

First we must understand who I used to be
A rebel kid, smoking joints, completely carefree
I would talk back to cops, even went to Juvi
Looking back, I feel bad for my parents who had to raise me

But soon thereafter God showed me a way
And gave me a choice to change or to stay
I chose God on that fateful day
and learned about a debt I could never repay

But this did not end with a happy story
Even whence exposed to God's love and glory
I saw in Christianity much hate, killings...gory
and decided that this is really not for me

And deeper down the hole I fell
my life became lust, gluttony, sloth, hell
and towards the heavens curses I would yell
And told God stay away, and I would as well

So I had control and vowed to make good ends
made money, but grew distant from family and friends
a plastic smile and temporary pleasures, I could no longer pretend
so I decided to turn to God and try to make amends

Now let's bring it to a more present time
But a little bit back, to two-thousand-and-nine
I went to God and said "yo dude, i'm in a bind.
you win, but let's make a truce, if you don't mind"

So it was done, what exactly I can't say
It's just for the big G and me to know, but hey
whatever the deal was, it turned out okay
I'm still no Jesus, but I'm trying to be better (or so I pray)

Finally, we come to the "now", the "present"
where I look back and wonder where all the time went
But I don't regret any moment of the dark times that were spent
'Cause I have a deeper understanding what Jesus' love meant

So who am I?  I'm but a man, a sinful man
but I've decided to change and made a plan
it's quite easy: whatever I can't, God can
I crawled my way towards God, but towards me, God ran

And so it begins...

Let's face it, 2009 was not a good year for many of us...no, the majority of us.  Call me an optimist, but I believe that 2010 is going to be a great year, I can feel it in my bones.  I'm not a new year's resolution type, but this year, I have made a creed to get fit and back in shape (apparently "round" wasn't flying with the ladies).  On top of that, this year will really be dedicated to my songwriting and experimentation of music composition as well as finishing all the other projects and work that I need to be doing. 

But more importantly, for a personal goal, I have decided to try and read the good book, a.k.a., the Holy Bible, from cover to cover, twice!  This is no ordinary feat people, try it for yourselves and I bet you will be falling asleep as soon as you hit Genesis Chapter 3.  I started with day 1 of the new year, and am on a good pace of reading about a dozen chapters a day.  Like I said, it's a personal goal; my life of sarcasm and sin was needing a helping of the good book last year, but I brushed it off due to disagreements with so-called Christians who I find to be absolutely abhorrent people.  But I have come to realize that I can't be angry at the man upstairs for the free-willed, detestable, arrogant and hypocritical lives of humankind; especially because I'm probably the one who should wear that crown.

So going back to getting back in shape, this will be the year that I will consider finding a serious relationship *gasp*.  But there is an order of priorities in life, and it is on the bottom of the list, somewhere inbetween getting a haircut and shopping for new clothes, which, if you know me at all, are both something that I dislike doing.  You may be thinking, "Diddy doesn't like relationships?" and if you are, reread what I wrote, I said nothing of that sort...but I won't disagree with you; I merely said it falls somewhere between those two matters on my list of to-do things.

Anyway, the moral of the day:  When you go to starbucks and they ask you how many teabags you want, don't giggle and say "none, thanks," because then you're left with just a cup of hot water, and you wasted two bucks.

Why are we so fascinated with the possibility of other intelligent lifeforms?  Is it all that sci-fi we're used to reading and watching?  Sure there are very important scientific studies going on saying that if there's life on other planets, there might be other inhabitable worlds and there may be ways to further our technology blah blah blah.  Still others, the "glass-half-empty" people say that once we find the other intelligent lifeforms (or when they find us), it will be the day of our demise.  Still, there are others that say aliens have been living among us since the dawn of time.  Blah blah blah, jabber jabber jabber.  I'm not worried about any of that.  What worries is something that could be far worse and far more is horrible.  I mean, seriously, what if the lifeforms are much more intelligent than we are?  I wouldn't want that that, no, I wouldn't want that at all.  The last thing I want is for the human race to be known as the dumbasses of the cosmos. 

I can picture it now:  "Hey alien from a galaxy, far far away, how are you?"  "Good man, real good, so what's there to do around here on this tiny planet anyway?"  "Umm, hmm, let's see...well, we can play some rock band, or watch some Star Wars...or hey, wanna go out for a drink?"  "Hmm...yea, no thanks, I think I'll go just warp over to nebulon alphateri and hang out with folks that can at least jump between wormholes." 

As we can see from that very possible example (and an even more possible dialogue), we have no chance of becoming friends with those beings.  Basically, those smart scientists at CERN (if you don't know what CERN is, it's a highly advanced science research facility), would look like infants playing with block toys compared to what I'm sure highly intelligent alien beings would have to play with. 


Moral of the day:   Jedi Mind Tricks only work if you are a Jedi Knight...I found out the hard way

So I walked into a bar...

Well, I didn't really walk into a bar, but I did end up watching the movie "D-WAR;" you know, that Korean movie, about dragons and what not, with the CGI and stuff...well if you don't know or haven't seen it yet, don't waste your time.  Here, I'll sum up the movie for you in 3 sentences and save you money and 2 hours of your life from waste.  There is a legend that there were two lovers who were separated and killed and their spirits were turned into spirits of dragons.  Fast forward thousands of years to the present where a boy is born with the same spirit of that dragon of the ancient man.  He fights evil and eventually learns to control this power of dragons and fights and wins and the spirits unite.  If you don't believe me that it was a horrible movie, go ahead and watch it for yourself, I actually dare you to go watch it.  And, after you watch it, remember to come back to this blog and read the very very very last sentence of this particular entry.

D-WAR, I believe this is the shortened version of the original title "D-WARst movie ever."  I think I drew a flip-book when I younger, of a stick figure doing a "hadooken" (it's a fireball from the street fighter video game, for those who have no idea what that means), that would be more amusing to watch than this film, and mine is only about 7 seconds long.




Moral of the day:  For those poor lost souls who did not heed my warning, "I told you so."

Humankind has to realize, that we're altogether different, altogether separate, and altogether similar.  These may seem like three very contradicting ideas, but it's very true of the nature of humankind, is it not? 
Scientific proof shows that the difference between individual human being is 0.001 x 100, or 0.1%, some scientists believe this difference is with gender, pigment coloration, genetic traits/diseases, all added together...to make 0.1%. 

But even more important is the fact that humankind and human life is a mystery.  There's a joke I once heard:  "Why is mankind such a mystery?  Well, you have to dissect the meaning from the origin of the word itself.  You have "mank" and "ind," what do they mean?  Not even the most ancient of languages know...therefore mankind is a mystery." 

But be assured, that if you are reading this, you are already well above the average crowd; indeed, you stand out from the sea of normalcy and in the midst of greatness.  If you are reading this, then it is true that you, much like I, are awesome (also if your name is Diddy....or Barney Stintson).  This is not mere opinion, it is fact...because I say so.

Therefore, brothers and sisters, I challenge you, go out and celebrate the wonderful arbitrary life as humans.  Do something that only we humans can do:  go and use your thumb, not as the simple primates do, but add another finger with it to use it as a form of universal language understood by most other human beings across the four corners of the earth.  Or, go punch some random person in the groin, not because it is instinct or a defense mechanism, but because it is a freedom of our own choosing, and because we can!  (But run like hell afterwards, and make sure they can't see your face, because you can, and will, be arrested). 

Today's moral:  Do not be a jerk to anyone unless you want to be punched in the groin.

thankseating

We always tell ourselves that we're going to control ourselves this year, but we never do.  We eat to the point where we are ashamed of ourselves, "but it's okay, it's thanksgiving."  But fear not, my people, you are not alone.  We are all partaking in this shameless holiday of overindulgence and gluttony.  But it did make me think:

As I was applying the homemade glaze that I made, a sinful concoction of honey and cinnamon with some ground nutmeg, boiled and blended together whilst adding bountiful amounts of crushed toffee, peanuts and almonds, I realized that this was all quite arbitrary due to the fact that the holiday itself is quite arbitrary, no?  Perhaps my mind was still half asleep from waking up at the break of noon, and floating around in my boxers and ninja turtle t-shirt, but I began to let my mind wander...why are we really celebrating this holiday?  I mean, technically, every day should be a thanksgiving day, if you really think about it.  Sure I mean for those depressed emo children who hate the very meaning of life (hence the reason they spend hours doing their hair and makeup and picking out the fashion to portray it), maybe for them, every day may not be a thanksgiving, but for the majority of us, we are indeed blessed and thankful.

But alas, the media and society has deemed Thanksgiving to be a day to splurge in gluttony and prepare ourselves to rack up some credit card debt for the following Friday.  America, F*#$ yeah!

So let's just take a moment and be truly grateful and thankful for the little things in life that we neglect.  Families and friends, the roof over our heads where we can wake up and walk around in our boxers and ninja turtle shirt, and simply having something that we can eat and have our fill.

Lastly, why is it that i'm disgustingly full, yet every time I pass by the dining table and see the leftover pie, my mind immediately says "take a slice."  It's the mystery of life, hence, life is a mystery.

Yeah, I made a blog. Wanna fight about it?

I decided that this would be a good way to rant and rave about some of the billions of random thoughts that go racing through my head at any given moment.  But don't expect anything life-changing, anything profound, or even grammatically and/or politically correct.  If it is any of the aforementioned, it is by chance, and I had not preconceived of it to be so, nor did I want for it to be.  It is all psychological and in your own individual mind (and you may want to seek some professional help).  Also, I will not be one of those bloggers that think out what and how I am going to write about these topics...what you see is quite literally what I am typing as my mind is processing.  Expect to be confused.  So for my first blog entry, I give you this:

So, I finally saw "The Obama Deception," and must say that it is a very good conspiracy theory.  But this is nothing new, I've been talking about some of these issues since I was back at my community college.  Also, if you wanna educate yourself on the future plans of the government and its agendas, you do not need to watch or read biased media, just go to the source..here's one for instance The SPP.  Just go visit the government website and you can read exactly what they are doing and what they are planning on doing.  (Word of caution, do not bother if you have high blood pressure or tendencies to 'flip out' because you will be angry at some of the issues and actions).   Here's another; North American Union Meetings  Yes, it seems as though the North American Union is something that is still being sought after, if you didn't know about it, don't worry, about 83% of the United States population has no clue what it is or what it is about.  Also, did you know the Federal Reserve has the power to change the nation's federal policies, but it isn't an actual federal agency?...that's right, it's just "named" that way but it's actually a private banking institution.  And who are the Bilderberg group?  Look it up, go research for yourselves, and get ready to shoot bricks out your backsides.

 Now, i'm not saying we should all go out and protest and/or create movements or make documentaries about government conspiracies; but educate yourself, and know what it is we are dealing with.  Also, remember that there is always two sides to an argument, therefore, if you're reading things from the Left of the spectrum, go and read what they are saying about that certain subject from the Right side.  Not only will you have a better overall understand of where you stand yourself, you will know the argument in its entirety (or at least from the 2 polar sides).

"We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he [or she] is someone today." Stacia Tauscher


So what was I saying before I got carried away with this?  Oh yea, I made a blog, hooray for me; and since you're reading this, hooray for you.  

Moral of the day:  typing on a laptop may cause wrist damage and pain over time, but at least you can lie down whilst you update your facebook status.